DR. WALLACE: I often catch myself wasting a lot of time throughout the day on most days even when I don’t intend to and have a lot that I need to get done! I guess I’ve always been an easily distracted person over the course of my lifetime, and so getting sidetracked these days happens all too often for me and in fact recently seems to be increasing.
This wasn’t a big deal when I was younger and had fewer responsibilities, but now that I’m getting older, I’m finding it difficult to take care of my obligations in a reasonable amount of time, mostly because I don’t use the time I have as effectively as I should.
How can I combat my mind-wandering tendencies and achieve greater focus in my life? Is this something I can improve upon, or is my personality set in stone and I’ll just have to become resigned to my fate in this way? — Time Floats Away, via email
TIME FLOATS AWAY: Keep a daily planner of some sort that you can get yourself to interact with throughout the day. Plan specific times for specific tasks. Make lists and cross off or checkmark each task once completed. Every person is different in this regard, so try different methods, but definitely keep your head in the day with printed materials to refer to.
Also think about why you feel you might be often distracted. Do you deny yourself a few guilty pleasures here and there? Are you bored? In any case, see if you can set up a system whereby you complete a few tasks you’re not thrilled about doing, but then as a reward take a block of 15 or 20 minutes to do something you truly like to do. You can then do this guilt free, since you’ll have “earned” the time to do so. Schedule some tasks and joys into your day and see if that can help you to move yourself ahead more regularly and less randomly.
In general, the more proactive about our time we can be, the better. Too much structure can at times be counterproductive, but if you plan the breaks into your day as well, you hopefully won’t feel too boxed-in while completing the important tasks you know you need to finish on a timely basis.
I NEED TO FIND THE BEST METHOD
DR. WALLACE: My boyfriend (he’s 21, I’m 20) comes home drunk a lot. And when he’s here at our apartment, he drinks until he’s drunk at least twice a week. It seems like I’m always trying to get him to sober up.
What’s the fastest way I can help him to sober up? Sometimes we plan to have friends over or I want to drive us to the movies (don’t worry, I never let him drive) and to do this properly, I need him to be sober.
I need to find my method of getting him quickly “back on the beam” so that he’s useful, not just a drooling drunk dude lying around.
How can I best accomplish this? — Frustrated Girlfriend, via email
FRUSTRATED GIRLFRIEND: The only way to accomplish this is to keep him from getting drunk in the first place. There is no quick fix to take a drunken body and magically and quickly make it sober.
No number of cold showers, hot coffees, brisk walks or home remedies will work. Only time can resolve the situation. It takes about an hour to metabolize each standard drink. So, depending on the amount of alcohol your boyfriend is consuming, it will take a corresponding amount of time for his body to metabolize it. I’d suggest you therefore focus your efforts on his consumption levels rather than seeking quick-fix methods to sober him up. Furthermore, it appears to me he has an ongoing alcohol problem. You should seek to get him professional assistance if he’s open to getting the help he needs.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected] To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
