DR. WALLACE: I’m a senior in high school and am trying to decide which major I should pursue in college. Attempting to make this decision has been extremely stressful for me, and it seems as though every time I come to a conclusion, I end up changing my mind.
Most of my friends already know the careers they want to pursue, and I can’t help but feel incredibly behind. I wish someone would point me in the right direction and tell me where to go and what to do. I feel as though I’m wandering aimlessly right now, and I don’t want to start college this way.
NEED DIRECTION: Selecting your college major may feel like a huge decision right now, but I assure you that in the long run, it is not as critical as it may seem. No choice you make will be definitive or irreversible. In fact, many college students change majors several times throughout the course of their academic careers, and I can guarantee you that some of your friends will end up doing the same.
The initial selection of your major is simply a point from which to start. It allows you to center your courses around a subject that may interest you and ultimately discover whether that interest is genuine. That being said, the best advice I can give you is to explore. College is a great time and place to get curious not only about what you want to do in life, but also about the person you want to be. Consider careers that best align with your values, your desired lifestyle and your goals. Take classes in these areas, and better yet, try out different internships in the fields that interest you so that you can get a true sense of what it is like to work in those fields.
I understand that once you have selected a major in college, changing it is not always an easy process, but it is possible. You are young, and nothing can stop you from making changes in your life that you are determined to make. Even after graduating, it is not uncommon for people to pursue careers outside of their college majors. Life is unpredictable, but that is what makes it worth living. Enjoy the journey, be curious and hungry to learn and in due time, you will find your way.
I WANT TO ASK HER TO GO STEADY
DR. WALLACE: I want to ask the girl I have been dating casually for four months now to become my steady girlfriend, but I’m worried that if she says no to my offer that will mean that our relationship will be over. — Nervous Boyfriend, via email
NERVOUS BOYFRIEND: You’ve been dating her now for several months, so you should know her pretty well by now.
At this point, you might have more to lose than to gain by pressing the issue. You appear to feel that your relationship is not as close as you wish for it to be, which has led you to want to “go steady” with her. As there may not be much upside to pressing her for an answer on that issue at this time, I suggest that you instead do your utmost to be the best boyfriend you can be — without going over the top, of course.
Simply treat her really well, enjoy your time together and let her know how much her friendship means to you. Over time, if the two of you are indeed meant to be close over the long run, a steady relationship will naturally evolve at its own pace, and you won’t feel the need to press her for answers on anything at all.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected] To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
